Supplied image – Danica Bunch, Author of She Has Breast Cancer.
When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, my world changed overnight. As a mum, the instinct to put everyone else’s needs ahead of my own was ingrained in me. But in the moment when my health became the priority—whether I liked it or not—I realised something that I hope other mums can learn without needing a diagnosis to nudge them – You can’t pour from an empty cup.
Before my diagnosis, life was a blur of deadlines, commitments, and the daily juggle of family and work. I was powering through, doing everything I could to be the mum my kids needed—showing up for school drop-offs, sports, and bedtime routines.Then came the diagnosis, and everything stopped. Suddenly, I wasn’t just “Mum.” I was a patient, navigating scans, treatments, and surgeries, all while holding onto the title of “Mum” as fiercely as I could.
Prioritising My Health Was the Hardest – and Best – Thing I’ve Done
Being told I had cancer meant I had no choice but to take care of myself. It was a tough realisation—I had to stop and ask for help, delegate, and put myself first. And as mums, we’re not always good at that, are we? We’re so used to being the glue that holds everyone together that we forget to nurture ourselves.
This diagnosis forced me to stop treating my health like an afterthought. I scheduled my check-ups and treatments with the same urgency I used to reserve for school lunches or soccer games. I saw specialists, started wellness practices, and even adjusted my lifestyle—all things I’d never given myself the permission to do before.
The Diagnosis That Made Me a More Present Mum
The most surprising part of my journey wasn’t how much I had to slow down—it was how much it allowed me to truly connect with my children. Cancer has a way of stripping life down to its essentials, and at the heart of it, I found motherhood.
I began to notice the small things—Lui’s witty jokes, Ava’s grace in her dance rehearsals, the way they both still seek comfort in my hugs. I wasn’t rushing past these moments anymore; I was savouring them. I realised how precious this role of being their mum truly is, and I felt more grateful for it than ever.
The gift of perspective that comes with a cancer diagnosis is a strange one. It makes you appreciate the ordinary moments: the breakfasts shared around the table, the car rides filled with chatter, the cuddles on the couch after a long day. These things became my anchor, pulling me through the hardest days.
What I Want Every Mum to Know
If there’s one message I could pass on to other mums, it’s this: Don’t wait for a health scare to put yourself first. Your family needs you to be healthy and well, and the only way to show up fully for them is to show up for yourself, too. That means booking the health checks you’ve been putting off, finding time to move your body, and asking for help when you need it.
Motherhood is an incredible gift, but we can’t give it our all if we’re running on empty. Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish—it’s the best thing you can do for the people you love most.
I used to think being a great mum meant doing everything for everyone. Now I know that the most valuable thing I can do for my children is to be here—present, healthy, and full of love.
Gratitude in the Chaos
While I wouldn’t wish a breast cancer diagnosis on anyone, it gave me a perspective I will carry with me forever. I’ve learned that life is unpredictable, but it’s also beautiful in its unpredictability. Every day I get to be with my children is a gift, and that’s something I don’t take for granted anymore.
To the mums reading this: Prioritise your health, ask for help when you need it, and make room for yourself in your busy life. Because being healthy isn’t just about living longer—it’s about living well, here and now, with the people you love most.
As part of Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I’ll be hosting online sessions based on my personal journey and insights from my book She Has Breast Cancer. Join me for an open and empowering conversation on living well through breast cancer and finding strength in the process. Register here for November session.
Danica Bunch is the author of She Has Breast Cancer. Please see website for more details – https://shehasbreastcancer.com/about/
Supplied image: Danica Bunch
Supplied image: Danica Bunch
